Reading note from member of audience:
‘I’m concerned about my son. He has very close friendship with the kuffar and is easily influenced by their lifestyles. He has no love or respect for the deen and this has been a cause of fitnah in our family. What can I do to change his attitude and how do I go about this? This has been going on for six years now.’
“I’m afraid that, I’m afraid that this question has been posed, or is posed, six years too late, maybe ten years too late or more. Really, I mean the education of our children starts very early in their lives. And what is sad to see, for many parents they send their children to the kuffar school, they allow them to mix with the kuffar, play with them and let the TV babysit their children for long hours every day so that the lifestyle and the beliefs of the kuffar become deep-rooted in the hearts of the kids. And then when they are in their twenties or late teens, then they realise that their children are not acting the way that they want them to act Islamically and they want to change them at that time. But that time is basically or normally too late to change…command your children to pray when they are seven years old and hit them if they do not pray, or they don’t pray right, when they are ten years, and separate between them and their sleeping places.”
“At seven you command him, so it’s (?) that we need to take the obligations of the deen seriously from the age of seven. So if a girl, if we have a girl she should start hijab from the age of seven. By the age of ten it becomes an obligation on us to force her to wear hijab. And if she doesn’t wear hijab we hit her. So that by the time she reaches puberty, once she is responsible before Allah for her deeds, when she is thirteen or fourteen years old, hijab for her is already a normal habit. She does not need to be reminded about it. Similarly for the prayer, similarly for all acts of the deen. We start our children on therm from the age of seven…so it sad to hear this from the questioner but what I’m saying is that he waited too late. He should have raised his child from the age of seven on mixing with the Muslims, staying away from the kuffar, having only Muslims as his friends, feeling the uniqueness and the pride of being Muslim and performing the obligations of Islam regularly and correctly from the age of seven until the age of ten, until puberty, so that after that all of this becomes a second nature to him.”
Closer than a Garment
Oral sex was not one of the known practices of the early righteous Muslims. In addition, it is known to be the practice of dogs and the disbelievers. The Muslims are encouraged to imitate the righteous salaf and are discouraged from imitating disbelievers or animals. Thus, oral sex is a disliked practice.
And a true Muslim is very anxious to be distinctive and different from the non-believers. This attitude follows from the repeated instructions of the Messenger, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, “Be different from the Jews and the Christians.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim], “Be different from the disbelievers.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim], and, “Whoever imitates a people is one of them.” [Authentic; narrated by Ahmad] Why is it so important to be distinctive and different from the disbelievers? For the following reasons:
“We Muslims are blessed with the best guidance. The Guidance from the Lord of lords, from Allah ta’ala. This gives us true dignity and pride that no one else has a claim to: Honor belongs to Allah, to the Messenger, and to the Believers.” [Al-Qur’an 63:8]
The disbelievers are misguided, and their ways are based on sick or deviant views concerning their societies, the universe, and their very existence. Their actions frequently reflect their deviant opinions. Why then would anyone ever think of imitating them? Yet Muslims sometimes do just that – they imitate them in their most unintelligible acts! The Messenger, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, “You [Muslims] will [in future times] follow the ways of those [disbelieving] nations who preceded you very closely; even if they enter into the hole of a lizard you would follow them into it.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
There is a substantial amount of evidence in Islam leading to the important rule: external agreement or similarity results in real similarity and agreement of the hearts. Thus, resembling disbelievers is Satan’s first step in leading Muslims to behave and believe like the kuffar (Those who reject Islam – disbelievers). Differing from the kuffar is of different levels or types, some of which are more important than others. They can be broadly classified as follows: Islam requires us to be different from non-Muslims in matters which are particular to their beliefs or worships, such as: wearing a cross, attending their religious services, wearing monks’ attires, displaying or valuing their idols, etc. Imitating the kuffar in such matters constitutes a major sin which is most possibly a form of disbelief that leads to permanent abode in the Hell Fire (may Allah, ta’ala, save us). Islam requires us to be different from the kuffar in matters which are representative of them or are characteristic of their identity, even if the religious aspect were not apparant in such matters. Examples of this type of requirements: growing beards and trimming moustaches, dying white hair, not to totally abandon women in their menses, etc. Matters which can be classified under the above two types should be treated similarly, even if there is no specific text to require such treatment. Examples: wearing the Western hat or wedding bands, carrying pictures of family members, walking dogs, wasting time in watching sports games and soap operas, etc. As for other matters which are done by the kuffar but are not specific to them, the above texts inform us that we should still try to be distinctive from them as much as possible. What is stated above should not be taken to mean, for instance, that we should not learn the sciences or use technology because the kuffar are currently its leaders. Islam requires us to learn and benefit from such forms knowledge, and this does not have to do with the subject of being different from the disbelievers.
As discussed earlier, Allah, ta’ala, and His Messenger, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, have warned us against following or imitating non-Muslims in things which are characteristic of their religions or beliefs. This is more emphasized in the case of their ‘Eid or occasions, which always hold some religious or ideological non-Islamic meanings, and on which the kuffar indulge in many evil practices. Differing from them on such occasions includes the following:
Staying completely away from their celebrations. This means to avoid places where they perform their holiday practices and to avoid participating with them in such practices (Christmas and New Year parties, Halloween trick-and-treat nonsense, Thanksgiving celebration and dinner, Fourth of July fireworks, First of April lies, birthday parties, anniversaries, etc).
Avoiding doing, ourselves, things which pertain to the practices of the kuffar on such occasions (allowing Christmas trees in our homes or offices, inviting our friends to a Turkey dinner on Thanksgiving day, allowing members of our families to purchase or borrow Halloween attires, holding birthday or anniversary parties for our family members, etc). Avoiding to congratulate the kuffar on their occasions. For, How can we bring ourselves to congratulate or wish people well for their disobedience to Allah,ta’ala? Thus expressions such as: happy Thanksgiving, happy birthday, happy New Year, etc, are completely out. The only possible happiness is in true iman! Avoiding to celebrate our eids in a way which is meant to copy the ways of the kuffar (mingling and shaking hands between men and women, improper cover for both genders, etc). Avoiding to initiate certain occasions or ‘Eid in imitation to theirs (the Day of the Earth, the Day of Iowa Muslims, etc.).
“So the main distinctive feature of the West is supposedly science and technology. They have the universities, they have the factories, they have the ability to make instruments and devices that people of the East cannot, or at best they can imitate. They have the sciences that are needed for the advancement of the societies and that is why many Muslims come to learn them, in order to take them, or that is part of the plan to take them back to their countries. However, we realise that in addition to this science and technology aspect of the West, which is one thing, during our time we find that the West has a distinctive cultural, a distinctive culture. It has a distinctive religious direction (?). It has a distinctive social, distinctive social standards. It has a distinctive set of morals. And so people who spend enough time in the West to gain the character, or the characteristics of the West, we find that they become infected by all of these things so that their morals will be the Westerners’ morals. Their religion will be a Western religion. Their culture will be the culture of the West. And their social standards will be the social standards of the West. We find, therefore, that the people who spend more time in the West, they start to value the cultural values of the West. Which means they will like whatever is supposed to be of value for the Westerners, such as, for example, the Greek teachings or the Greek history, the Roman history, the Roman and Greek methodologies, things like that.
So this culture becomes an inherent culture of the (…?) dissolved in the Western societies. The religious values, even for Muslims, become generally weak, shaky, vague and they accept many of the religious values of the West, to the extent that you find many of them calling to the unity or the interfaith. And many of them afraid to say about a Christian for example that…that a Christian is a kafir, or things like that. We find that the morals of people who spend more time in the West, and sometimes very short times, become totally degenerate. We find, and we know that in the West, the family standards are loose and shaky or totally severed. They do not care about their relatives, about their friends, about their children. We find that they call to sinning, they call to zina. Their value forms in advertisements on the TV, in the newspapers, everywhere you look. Or the cheap way women dress, the way men dress, everything is a call to zina. We find in the attitude and the ignorance of the youngsters a great deviation from not only human morals but even some of the animal qualities that Allah has gave as distinctive qualities to the animals. So if you ask that even the animals would not do. So what is the combination of values? Some of them are very evil, drinking alcohol, smoking…the Western appearance and attitude and so on.
So this is what the West stands for. And as you see, it is good and bad. It is good and evil mixed together. And we cannot, we may not take it as a whole package. We may not take the West as a whole package. The truth is that if we take it as a whole package then we will be taking with it all the evil that is with it. And Allah knows, and we know, from Allah’s teachings, that whatever is good in the West is not worth any of the evil in the West.
The science and technology and finance of the West are worthless in the sight of Allah. And their only benefit of worth is when they are directed to where? To increasing our bank accounts? No, when they are directed to obeying Allah (SWT) and supporting the deen and raising Islam. So they are if they are (?) by accident then they are excluded from the curse of Allah (SWT) otherwise they are accursed.
So we have to understand, we have to first of all clarify our future, or our view to the Western civilisation. And remove that veil that has been put on our eyes by the glitter and glamour of the Western society, so that we cannot anymore distinguish between its good and its evil. We must see its good in its right, true perspective and its evil in its true perspective as well. And we may take of the good what we need…and we must avoid the evil totally. So we Muslims arrive here in the West. Why did we come here? We came for various reasons. Many of us came because of what we said earlier, the Western civilisation, the Western science and technology we want to (?) and we want to improve our countries. We need to improve our status, we want to please Allah…as many of us claim. Many come to improve their financial status, so they can work here, and to stay here is better than to stay in many, or most of the Muslim countries. So, by that, they can support themselves here as well as take some money [to] support their families or relatives in the Muslim countries or save money so that they can go back and live their decent life. Others are here for purposes of tourism, to tour the countries where Allah is being disobeyed more than other countries or other places for the sake of tourism. Others come because they are refugees, they can’t go anywhere else, and anywhere else that they go they [will] be threatened in various ways. Others come for the purpose of dawah, to call to the way of Allah (Azza wa-jall). And many of those who come for those various reasons, they stay for just three, four months at a time to fulfill whatever they came for and go back. Others stay for longer. And many, many of those who plan to spend a short period of time, we find that they spend much longer than they anticipated. They plan to spend a couple of years to get a degree but they spend many years working and doing other things before they go back to their countries, if they ever go back. So people come for tourism and they like it here and they decide to stay. And others who…they tried to go back and they find a big difference in the sort of freedom in this part of the world or the Western countries, as compared to the Eastern or third world countries, so therefore they decide that ‘I cannot live where I used to live, I want to stay here.’ So whatever our reasons, whatever brings people here, we find that most of the time, they spend longer years, more years here than they ever planned to spend. And they end up living most of their life in the West, having children, their children also growing up to adulthood and getting married in where they still are, or in the West.
So, as Muslims, whether we consider it permissible according to Islam or not, whether it is recommended or not, whether we like it or not, since Muslims are coming to the West anyway, and they are staying anyway, then they have, they must know how to minimize the damage that shall reach them from living in the Western societies. The Muslims who come to the West will eventually, either they, or their children, suffer from damage in various forms. And the damage comes from the evil that exists in the West more than they do in the Muslim countries. I’m not saying of course that the Muslim countries are perfect and there is no damage, no evil. The evil unfortunately in our time is everywhere.
All they do is show you that, on the TV, in the news, that all the successful people, the successful businessmen are nicely shaved. So that digs futher, deeper in our hearts and puts more pressure on many people, on the weak hearted people, than beating. Because when somebody is beaten, he may shave his beard so that he will not be beaten again, but he will love to grow his beard. And he will take the chance to grow it. But when he is under the pressure of the media, and he is convinced by it, that this is the idea of a successful man, a man with a suit and tie and clean shaven, then he will do it voluntarily. And he will take pleasure in removing his beard every morning that the Prophet (SAW) commanded him not to touch it. He will take pleasure in disobeying the sunnah of Rasūlullāh Sallallāhu ‘Alaihi wasallam every morning. Take pleasure to see this clean shaven, smooth appearance on his face. Why is that? Because he has been brainwashed by the Western media. So that is the danger of being in the West. And by the way, being in the West sometimes, does not necessarily have to be by the body because you know that with today’s communications, when you are in the Muslim countries you are also much of the time under the influence of the same networks and the same media, and therefore, many of the things that reach people here, reach people in the East or in the Muslim countries as well. But here of course the influence is more direct, more continuous, daily and so on, so that the person feels so much pressure that he cannot give way sooner or later. So we find that the Muslims living in the West, they, or their children, to varying degrees will eventually move away from the straight path of Islam. We find that their morals are contaminated with the Western morals. Now, when somebody at his workplace, and as I say, I mean I’m saying ‘the West, the West, the West,’ even though I know that many of these vices are present in the Muslim countries unfortunately in our time, but they were brought to our countries from the West, and they were adopted by our countries from foreign places….But in the West what I’m saying, is imagine a person who is working in a company where there is a secretary, and there is, his boss could be, his superior could be a woman, or somebody who works under him and so on. So there are men and women and they exchange jobs, they exchange words, they laugh together. Now this man, do you expect him to feel anything wrong in his heart about mixing between men and women? He wouldn’t because he is used to it. He does it all the time in his workplace. He sees it on the TV. He sees it on the street. And he goes to some of the company meetings or parties or whatever. Then he will certainly, with time, become, lose the ability to enjoin good and forbid evil from his life. So that is one thing that was what? One moral act or moral aspect or moral value that has been lost from his life. He sees people drinking. He sees them on the TV drinking. He sees the advertisements of alcohol everywhere. It becomes so normal to him that he doesn’t even see it when he looks at it anymore. So there is no enjoining good and forbidding evil in his heart anymore. And that means that another moral value has gone from his life. So if he is not against it then there will be a time when he could be for it. You can take , for example, in regard to morals, dealing with the parents, dealing with the relatives, dealing with the guests. You know there is no hospitality among the Westerners as there is among the Muslims…This is not possible to be imagined by the Westerners, and to them it is an act of craziness to go to such trouble to please a guest. Kindness to the parents, kindness to the relatives, respecting the elders, being merciful towards the youngsters or the kids and so on. So many characteristics and so many morals that are part of the Islamic identity are lost to Muslims who stay and live in the West and are influenced by the Western world. So the character of the Muslim becomes a Western character. Their behavior, a Western behavior. And added to that, we find that as soon as Muslims start having children they have no choice but to have to send them to school…So we find that as soon as they have children, they send them to public schools, to the kafir schools. And therefore their children, more than the parents, the second generation, more than the first generation, become saturated with the Western characteristics, with the Western values and they become Western, totally Western. So you find that most of the second generation in the West is totally lost.
So how can we accept the fact that we are the ones who are sending our children to destruction? To their doom. So what should we do? The situation is so serious. What can we do about it to safeguard ourselves and our children and our families in the West? What should the Muslims do? There are many things. I will mention a few because of the limitations of time and most of them will be general things or general concepts. If the time permits I will get into some more practical aspects inshallah.
First of all we have to stay away from the disbelievers. How can it be when we are in the middle of them? How can we stay away from them? Stay away from them as much as we can. (Arabic) as much as you can. To your maximum ability that is. So we have to exert our maximum capability to stay away from (…?) kuffar. So the rule should be, in ourselves, in our attitude, in our behaviour, that we should be away from the disbelievers unless we have to for certain reasons, for certain things. And not the other way around, if we have to be with them but sometimes I can take a few moments to go and be with the Muslims. No, it should be the other way around that I do not want to be with the disbelievers, and if I have to work with them then I limit my contact with them to the business. It will be a business relation, no joking, no visiting, no partying, no invitation to eating except for the sincere reason of dawah and no other reason. If we know that by inviting our colleague to lunch then it will give us a chance to give dawah to him and to teach him something about Islam so that he may hear some good things and probably he will embrace Islam. Other than that we should limit our dealing with them to the minimum because we do not love them. We do not love them, rather we hate them for the sake of Allah. And we love guidance for them, we love to guide them. But we do not love them, we love to guide them. That’s why the attitude of our Prophet (SAW) that he was concerned about all of the people, all of humanity. He wanted to guide everyone and if anyone did not listen to him doing dawah he would feel sad. And Allah (Azza wa-jall) told him that he should not kill himself of sadness because of they did not want to listen to him. So this should be our attitude that we are so concerned, we have a great concern about guiding those lost people but not at the cost of misguiding ourselves. Not at the cost of losing our deen for their sake. We come first, they come second. If we go to buy something from a supermarket or wherever, we try to do it in the easiest way and the shortest way. Do it quickly and get out. Don’t linger around. Don’t go and walk in malls or big markets where you have to walk and do window shopping, as they call it, for hours until you finally decide what you want to buy. Know what you want to buy, go and get it and come back quickly. We have to limit our contact with them whether it is by words, by typical (?), by looking to them on the TVs.”
The Muslims are blessed with the best guidance. The disbelievers are misguided, and their ways are based on wrong views. Their actions frequently reflect their deviant views. Why, then, would one wish to imitate them? Yet, sadly, some Muslims imitate them, even in meaningless acts!
Resembling the disbelievers is Satan’s first step in leading the Muslims to behave and believe like them. The worst form of imitation of the non-Muslims is in practices that involve shirk or are based on their deviant religious beliefs.
A true Muslim holds a correct Islamic understanding regarding celebrations. He only celebrates the festivals that have been legislated by Allah. Festivals are religious occasions characteristic of every nation’s religion or beliefs. Thus, it is compulsory on the Muslims to avoid imitating the disbelievers in their festivals or join in any of the practices that are associated with them. This includes answering their invitations, congratulating them, giving them presents, displaying their symbols, or doing any other act, regardless of how small it might appear, that indicates approval of their festivals.
Therefore, taking any part in celebrating it is greatly prohibited in Islam. It is worse than joining with sinners in their sins or congratulating them for drinking wine, fornication and so on. Celebrating Halloween is similar to celebrating Christmas or Easter, or congratulating the Christians for their prostration to the crucifix. The Muslim parents should caution their children and prevent them from participating in any of its practices. Despite its clear prohibition, it is sad to see some Muslims participate in Halloween, purchase and wear silly Halloween costumes, and send their kids “trick-or-treating”. They try to justify this by that they want to make their children happy. But what is the duty of the Muslim parents? Is it to follow the wishes of their children without question or to mould them within the correct Islamic framework as outlined in the Qur’an and Sunnah? Is it not the responsibility of the Muslim parents to impart correct Islamic training and instruction to their children? How can this duty be performed if, instead of instructing the children in Islam, their parents allow and encourage them to follow the ways of the unbelievers?
If the children are taught to be proud of their Islamic heritage, they themselves will abstain from Halloween and other non-Muslim celebrations, such as birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Valentine’s Day, etc. Islam is a pure religion with no need for accommodating any custom, practice or celebration that is not a part of it. The question arises as to what to do on Halloween night. The Muslim parents must not send their kids “trick-or-treating”. Our children must be told why we do not celebrate Halloween. Simplifying the above material may be very suitable for this purpose. Most children are very receptive when taught with sincerity.
It must also be noted that, even the Muslims who stay home and give out treats to those who come to their door are thereby participating in this festival. In order to avoid this, they should leave their front lights off and should not open their door. Furthermore, they should educate their neighbors about the Islamic teachings and inform them in advance that the Muslims do not participate in Halloween.
Smoking is a form of moral decadence. It is most spread among the low-class immoral people. It reflects blind imitation of the non-Muslims. It is mostly consumed in bars, discos, casinos, and other: places of sin. A smoker may beg or steal if he does not have the money to buy cigarettes. He is ill-mannered with his friends and family, especially when he misses taking his necessary “dose” at the usual time.
Closer than a Garment
Many Western behavioral and so-called social scientists, such as Freud, declare that masturbation is perfectly acceptable and has no harmful effects. Those scientists” have similar approaches with other sexual aberrations. Their misconceptions have poisoned the thoughts of most people in our time, has given them a deviant understanding of many aspects of human sexuality, and have made sexual aberrations, even the extreme ones, like homosexuality acceptable by many.
Sodomy or homosexuality (in Arabic, liwat) is for a man to perform anal intercourse with another man. Sodomy is the most appalling sexual aberration for men. It indicates a marked deviation in man’s nature from the pure and clean state upon which Allah (&) created him. It is a major sin that was not committed by any human beings prior to the Sodomite people of Lut.
From the above ayat, we see that sodomy is a major sin that deserves a most severe punishment. Some of today’s cultures are sympathetic with it, giving it misleading names such as “sexual preference”, “alternative lifestyle”, and “gayness”. They also sympathize with the criminals who commit it and allow them social rights that reach the level of offending the “straight” people. This only points to the serious degree of corruption that the modern civilization has reached.
Under the Islamic law, a person who is convicted of sodomy is subject to the capital punishment of killing.
Thus, what we hear nowadays of some so-called Muslims establishing so-called “Muslim gay associations” is a clear nonsense. A person who is afflicted by indulgence in such a major sin must hide away his sin and repent to Allah rather than insisting on it and daring to openly advertise his wickedness.
It is important to emphasize what we previously mentioned: The Islamic penalties for various crimes are only handled by the ruler of the Islamic state or his authorized representative. It is not to the individuals or local community imams to establish such penalties.
Lesbianism (in Arabic, sihaq) is an aberration whereby two women perform sexual acts together. This would normally involve many violations to Islam, mainly:
1. Exposing their ‘awrah to each other.
2. Touching or rubbing each other’s private parts, and performing other acts of intimacy that may only be done between a woman and her husband.
3. Performing various perverted acts (some of which are discussed in this chapter) in order to reach sexual gratification.
All of the above contradicts the wisdom of marriage and violates Allah’s command to the believers to guard their private parts from other than their spouses. Because of this, sihaq is clearly prohibited in Islam. Its penalty under the Islamic law is left to the Islamic ruler’s judgment.
Closer than a Garment
Rape is performing sexual intercourse by force with non-consenting individual. Most commonly, the man is the criminal and the woman is the victim in a rape act. One should note that many women in our time have made themselves appealing preys to rape by the indecent way they dress and act. Pornography, alcohol, and drugs give many men added incentive for rape.
“It is not permissible to have intercourse with a pregnant woman who is a captive of war, because that would lead to a confusion in the lineage of the baby, which would reflect on inheritance and other matters.”
ESTABLISHING ISLAMIC LAW
We must help provide realistic Islamic solutions to contemporary problems, and strive to resume a true Islamic way of life and establish a true Islamic society governed by Allah’s law.